Monday, October 31, 2011

Moving on Up

Cora has moved up to her toddler class. As a graduate of "Baby Birds" and moving up to "Busy Bee", I decided to give a nice little compilation of her status sheets from Baby Bird. Jamey is in charge of dropping the kids off. This is a big job involving a less than relaxing ride to and from work. However, Jamey felt it needed more effort. As such, he looked through the news every morning determined to find the best representation of "child's mood" to fill in on the daily status sheets. I also enjoyed the reaction (or lack thereof) from the teachers under "Teacher's comment's" Here is a best of collection



 3/28/2011
Child's Mood: A SWEDISH MEDICAL STUDY FOUND THAT REGULAR JOGGING MAY ACTUALLY BE GOOD FOR THE KNEE JOINTS - PROMOTING CARTILAGE GROWTH AND INCREASED BONE MASS. THE STUDY MADE NO MENTION OF THE EFFECTS OF CRAWLING ON KNEES. SO CORA SAID SHE WOULD TAKE IT EASY - JUST TO BE SAFE. Teacher's Comments: None.

 3/29/2011
CHILD'S MOOD: PEDIATRICIANS ADVISE YOUNG FEMALE ATHLETES TO NOT WEAR SPANX. CORA SIGHED LOOKING AT HER THIGHS AND SAID NO AMOUNT OF SPANX WOULD MAKE A FASTER CRAWLER ANYWAY.
 Teacher's Comments: Cora enjoys playing with the sensory bottles (Stacy note: water bottles with crap in them and the lid hot glued on) today. She seemed very happy today.

 4/1/2011
Child's Mood: THE NATIONAL BIRTH RATE FELL 4% BETWEEN 2007 AND 2009 - MORE THAN IT HAS ANY TWO YEAR PERIOD IN THE PAST 30 YEARS. CORA SAYS THE BIRTH RATE IN HER HOUSEHOLD HAS ALSO SHARPLY DECLINED.
 Teacher's Comments: Cora enjoys playing with the tactile teethers with friends today. Have a great beach vacation!!!

6/14/2011
Child's Mood: BAGGAGE FEES FOR AIRLINES IN THE US REACHED $3.4 BILLION IN 2010. CORA SAYS SHE'LL GLADLY PAY EXTRA IF IT MEANS SHE DOESN'T HAVE TO LEAVE HER 2200 WATT HAIR DRYER BEHIND.
 Teacher's Comments: Cora did a great job today trying new foods from the menu. She really enjoyed being able to sit and eat with the other children. She fussed a little if we did not bring her food quick enough. :-)

6/6/2011
Child's Mood: CORA CASUALLY DISMISSED THE RECOMMENDATION LAST WEEK FROM THE AMERICAN ASSOCIATION OF PEDIATRICS WHICH STATES CHILDREN AND ADOLESCENTS SHOULD NEVER USE ENERGY DRINKS. WITHOUT HER COFFEE AND RED BULL, SHE'D NEVER GET THROUGH THE DAY.
Teacher Comments: Cora enjoyed playing in the tunnel and practicing to walk with Ms. Brittany today. 

6/9/2011
Child's Mood: FACING POWER SHORTAGES, SOME JAPANESE OFFICES ARE TRADING AIR CONDITIONING FOR OPEN WINDOWS AND THE SUIT AND TIE FOR HAWAIIAN SHIRTS. CORA GIGGLED AT THE THOUGHT OF AN ENTIRE BUILDING FULL OF PEOPLE DRESSED LIKE PAPA.

6/10/2011 Child's Mood: US NEWS AWARDED THE DASH DIET A 3.9 OUT OF 5 STARS. CORA IS CONSIDERING GIVING IT A TRY TO GET READY FOR SWIMSUIT SEASON. BUT SHE'LL START MONDAY, BECAUSE SHE IS NOT SKIPPING BIRTHDAY CAKE THIS WEEKEND.
 Teacher's Comments: Cora enjoyed water play today. She loved being outside and did not mind water splashed on her. Have a great weekend. Enjoy the birthday cake before your big diet Cora (Stacy comment: This is the only reference I ever say that they read the mood)

 6/13/2011 Child's Mood: A NEW TYPE OF ARTIFICIAL HEART KEEPS 8-MONTH-OLD CALF, ABIGAIL, HAPPY WITHOUT A HEARTBEAT OR PULSE. IF ABIGAIL GROWS UP TO HAVE A CALF OF HER OWN, CORA WONDERS WHAT SOUND TO PLAY IN THE BABY'S CRIB TO KEEP IT HAPPY?
 Teacher's Comments: Cora enjoyed tossing small balls in the tunnel today with Ms. Brittany. Her hand and eye coordinating is developing more and more.

 9/2/2011
Child's Mood: FEDERAL AUTHORITIES RAIDED AND HALTED WORK AT GIBSON GUITAR FACTORIES IN TENNESSEE IN A SEARCH FOR ILLEGAL WOOD. CORA IS GLAD THE RAID WAS TOO LATE TO IMPACT SHIPMENTS TO GUITAR CENTER FOR THEIR BIG LABOR DAY SALE, BECAUSE THAT 15% OFF COUPON IS BURNING A HOLE IN HER POCKET.
Teacher's comments: Cora enjoyed Thomas's birthday party today. It was a great start to a long weekend. 

9/1/2011
Child's Mood: THE AMERICAN ACADEMY OF PEDIATRICS SAYS NO MORE BOXING AS A SCHOOL SPORT. THIS IS GOOD NEWS FOR CORA'S CLASSMATES WHO NOW HAVE A LEGITIMATE EXCUSE TO DECLINE HER REPEATED TAUNTS TO MEET HER IN THE RING.
 Teacher's Comments: Cora enjoyed playing with small balls and squeeze toys today.

 9/12/2011
Child's Mood: CORA WAS DISAPPOINTED WHEN SHE WAS TOLD YOU CAN'T ACTUALLY EAT A "DOUBLE-IRISH DUTCH SANDWICH", BUT CHEERED UP WHEN IT WAS EXPLAINED SHE COULD USE THIS STRATEGY TO PAY SINGLE-DIGIT CORPORATE INCOME TAXES ON HER LIFE COUCH CONSULTING SERVICES BUSINESS. Teacher Comments: Cora enjoyed playing peek-a-boo while in the tunnel today. She also took one step by herself today. Yea Cora!

 9/15/2011
Child's Mood: COMPUTER PROGRAMMING JOBS REMAIN COMPETITIVE IN OUR STRUGGLING ECONOMY. CORA STRUGGLES WITH WHETHER SHE SHOULD LEARN OBJECTIVE C OR JAVASCRIPT FIRST.
 Teacher Comments: Cora enjoyed playing in the blue tunnel. She really liked making funny faces at Ms. Brittany while inside the tunnel.

 9/6/2011
Child's Mood: CORA PREPARES TO SAY HER FAREWELLS TO THE PARTICLE COLLIDER OUTSIDE CHICAGO AND LOOK TO THE LARGER HADRON PARTICLE COLLIDER NEAR GENEVA FOR ALL HER QUANTUM PHYSICS RESEARCH NEEDS.
 Teacher's Comments: Cora did not take a second bottle today. She waited till snack. If she keeps this up, we may take the second bottle away also.

 9/7/2011
Child's Mood: CHILDREN MISS AN AVERAGE OF ONE MORE SCHOOL DAY A YEAR IF ONE PARENT SMOKES AT HOME; ONE AND A HALF IF BOTH PARENTS SMOKE. CORA THINKS NOT GETTING TO GO TO SCHOOL AND SEE YOUR FRIENDS IS A FILTHY DIRTY HABIT.
Teacher's Comments: Cora was surprised to see herself in the Mirror Me book! :-)


 9/12/2011
Child's Mood: CORA WAS DISAPPOINTED WHEN SHE WAS TOLD YOU CAN'T ACTUALLY EAT A "DOUBLE-IRISH DUTCH SANDWICH", BUT CHEERED UP WHEN IT WAS EXPLAINED SHE COULD USE THIS STRATEGY TO PAY SINGLE-DIGIT CORPORATE INCOME TAXES ON HER LIFE COUCH CONSULTING SERVICES BUSINESS.
Teacher Comments: Cora enjoyed playing peek-a-boo while in the tunnel today. She also took one step by herself today. Yea Cora!

 9/15/2011
Child's Mood: COMPUTER PROGRAMMING JOBS REMAIN COMPETITIVE IN OUR STRUGGLING ECONOMY. CORA STRUGGLES WITH WHETHER SHE SHOULD LEARN OBJECTIVE C OR JAVASCRIPT FIRST.
 Teacher Comments: Cora enjoyed playing in the blue tunnel. She really liked making funny faces at Ms. Brittany while inside the tunnel.

9/23/2011
Child's Mood: CORA HAS LONG BEEN A FAN OF MIXING ANIMAL PRINTS IN HER WARDROBE, SO SHE WAS HAPPY TO HEAR OF AFRICAN FARMERS MIXING COWS AND ZEBRAS ON THE RANCH. COWS AND ZEBRAS PREFER DIFFERENT PARTS OF THE GRASS STALKS,S O THEY MAKE GREAT GRAZING BUDDIES.
 Teacher's Comments: None.